I am not quite sure how it is possible for my house to look simultaneously cluttered and empty, but it does. Two days ago I began the overwhelming task of packing my life away in order to move from a three bedroom house with a basement to a two bedroom apartment and honestly, I had no idea one human being could possibly accumulate that much stuff.
While we were packing yesterday, Jesse and I got to talking about how the whole process of moving is actually quite fun. You get to see everything you own, there's excitement about the new place and new places to put and arrange things. But this time it's even more exciting and different. This time I am moving in with the man of my dreams. Finally, after a year of juggling schedules, friends, work, and classes we get to start out lives together. Not that we hadn't already done that but from now on we'll be in the same spot. We're moving into another stage of our lives.
I suppose one of the most exciting aspects of this whole thing is that we are finally out in the world on our own, getting to make our own decisions about our time and how it's handled. And to be perfectly frank, we get to be a little selfish about that. No more "Oh but he's just your boyfriend spend time with me instead." No more guilt trips. From now on Jesse and I are top priority, everything else comes second. Granted, this will take some adjusting to but it's going to be worth it.
Secretly I'm a little bit nervous, but in an excited sort of way, for this next stage. I've always had an independent nature so being on my own isn't an issue. It's the having to share space with another person again with the added pressure of that other person being the love of my life. I just don't want to scare him off. Even though the ring has been picked out and I know that we are madly in love with each other, the ring isn't on my finger yet. If I am truly honest with myself then I must confess that that worries me a little bit, deep down in the crevices of my thoughts. Originally when we first started talking about getting married we had set a tentative time line for our engagement, knowing that despite my liberal tendencies I would be a little uncomfortable not being engaged before we moved in together. And here we are; a week and two days from move in and we still aren't engaged.
That hard part about all of this is that when we move in together we will be married in every way except officially. I love him. I wish money wasn't a factor. . .
While we were packing yesterday, Jesse and I got to talking about how the whole process of moving is actually quite fun. You get to see everything you own, there's excitement about the new place and new places to put and arrange things. But this time it's even more exciting and different. This time I am moving in with the man of my dreams. Finally, after a year of juggling schedules, friends, work, and classes we get to start out lives together. Not that we hadn't already done that but from now on we'll be in the same spot. We're moving into another stage of our lives.
I suppose one of the most exciting aspects of this whole thing is that we are finally out in the world on our own, getting to make our own decisions about our time and how it's handled. And to be perfectly frank, we get to be a little selfish about that. No more "Oh but he's just your boyfriend spend time with me instead." No more guilt trips. From now on Jesse and I are top priority, everything else comes second. Granted, this will take some adjusting to but it's going to be worth it.
Secretly I'm a little bit nervous, but in an excited sort of way, for this next stage. I've always had an independent nature so being on my own isn't an issue. It's the having to share space with another person again with the added pressure of that other person being the love of my life. I just don't want to scare him off. Even though the ring has been picked out and I know that we are madly in love with each other, the ring isn't on my finger yet. If I am truly honest with myself then I must confess that that worries me a little bit, deep down in the crevices of my thoughts. Originally when we first started talking about getting married we had set a tentative time line for our engagement, knowing that despite my liberal tendencies I would be a little uncomfortable not being engaged before we moved in together. And here we are; a week and two days from move in and we still aren't engaged.
That hard part about all of this is that when we move in together we will be married in every way except officially. I love him. I wish money wasn't a factor. . .
2 comments:
I think it is a good that you are not yet engage it will give you some space to think it thru once more because when you move together with each other you vill be surpriced about how many little things that you still did not knew about each other.
But still, i hope that a ring will soon be on your finger ;)
Good Luck!!
//L.
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